Where’s the Moose?

Back in the eighties, Wendy’s released a classic TV commercial. Octogenarian Clara Peller captivated the nation by demanding to know just one little thing about a Wendy’s competitor’s burger: “Where’s the beef?”


Sarah-mania (Palin, that is) is now captivating the nation. Palin is, so the reports go, a maverick executive. She takes on corruption and wins. Her nickname in high school was “Barracuda.” She’s a take-no-prisoners, salmon-gutting, moose-huntin’, rifle-totin’ evangelical Christian force of nature. Oh, and she’s a woman. Did you miss that part?

First, props to John McCain for having the cojones to name a woman to the Republican ticket. That one came out of the clear blue. But still, Sarah Palin? She’s been the governor of Alaska for roughly two years, and that somehow qualifies her to stand second in line to the presidency?

I have no problem with Palin’s gender. I’m all for smart women. I have nothing against ex-beauty queens. I have nothing against women who play ruthless politics, man-style. But seriously. What can this woman possibly offer the country as a whole that makes her objectively far more qualified than other Republican woman like Elizabeth Dole, Christine Todd Whitman, Kay Bailey Hutchinson, or Olympia Snowe? If the McCain party folks picked Palin because she’s the best candidate, that’s one thing. But if they picked her because she’s good looking and happens to wear a skirt and they’re trolling for that slippery soccer mom vote, then I’m insulted. Do those people seriously think I’d vote for McCain simply because he’s got a girl on the ticket? If so, they’ve underestimated the intelligence of the female American voter. No way in Hades I’m voting for Palin until she can, unequivocally and thoroughly, answer this question:

Where’s the moose?

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